The Unknown

Ever felt being lost in a whirlwind of emotions? Being swept away by storms? Feeling this void deep within? Feeling this INDESCRIBABLE emotion whilst letting go of almost everything? This feeling of uncertainty.. the feeling of standing raw and ripped and bared to the flames of the unknown.

THE UNKNOWN .. what is it? How is it? It creates anxiety.. It creates expectations.. It creates hopefulness and also doubts..

The void brings out an outburst of welcomed and most unwelcomed of all emotions. The mixture of positivity and negativity. And all your left with is to wonder which one shall reign?

I’m in a dilemma.. trying to figure out which battlefield I’m standing on? what am I fighting against? What is all this about?

Its like your suddenly whacked and thrown off your pendulum. You lose your balance and you just keep falling without a landing. And whilst you fall , there’s this torturous wait to know the unknown, to face fears, to realize there’s no choice available here.

Sometimes its beyond our understanding to figure out the deep underlying meaning beneath all the hazy- crazy- messy life.

There are those tough rough hard times where you need to wear a cloak of pretense and show the world that you’re “perfectly fine, not afraid, not confused, not falling apart.” But more than the world, these are the times when you pretend the most with your own-self. You pretend so much and get so habituated that there comes a time when the cloak will become a crucial part of you and no longer be used as a prop.

These are the times when once you’re hit by a ton of bricks, you get all so pessimistic that there’s more of this… Et voila.. there it is , the walls collapsing on you, doors closing on you. The life you created suddenly- just like the sand is gnawed by the waves of the sea- just rips apart. When you get all negative, there’s no limit to what extent of negativity you can reach that can pull you off the cliff you hang on, and take you drowning deep into the unwelcomed ocean of pessimism. And all that happens whilst your trapped in there, is more because of this parasite in your mind , body and soul. The parasite that flicks off any small spark of positivity or hope or courage or anything that could help you out. It makes you believe there’s no way out, when there is. It makes you accept that you cannot break free through the walls threatening and looming over you. You feel diminished by absolute negativity that you begin to see in almost everything. And you begin to accept that this is how it should be and you are fine. Well! You are NOT.

You are thrown out your comfy zone. Now … now.. this is yet another trial.. And you need to use the correct switches available to break out the cuffs and chains that stagnate your growth, that lead you not to positivity.

It’s a matter of choices we need to make. And sometimes we need to be harsher than the harsh. We need to PUSH when being pulled with equal force. We need to realise that the leech or the parasite can be crushed.

Life gives us a fair amount of choices and options. Most that it offers always comes with a switch that we can use to our likings. But many a times we choose to be purposefully unaware. But there are the other  times when you’re not given a choice but there’s something else working for you- unfavourable yet in favour of you- not so likeable yet what is best for you. You can call it any name you want- “Karma”.. “Fate”.. “Destiny” .. “Universe and its energy” … “GOD”..

So long you accept that there’s some energy around you fiddling with your life, that it helps you fix the puzzle or throws at you yet another one. You’ll be able to vaguely see and imagine a bigger picture of what all this is leading you to. It’s a step at a time. Small bits falling together.

Where’s the beauty if life had to be comfy and cozy and nicy-dicy all the time? Where’s the exhilarating adventure without another turn, twist or a toss?

Where’s the fun without fears , provocation, storms and THE UNKNOWN?

The unknown is better. Knowing everything wouldn’t help us in anyway. Not knowing helps us to master the art to KNOW.

The unknown is filled with blessons (blessings & lessons). Enjoy the ride with all the topsy turvy roads at your disposal.

Again I’d repeat …. “YOU CONTROL YOUR LIFE, Not the other way round. Yes , there is the inevitable, But the evitable will be based on the choices you make,”

Sometimes it’s all like MAKE-BELIEVE. There’s no other artist who will paint your life best for you. BECAUSE YOU ARE THE ULTIMATE UNIQUE ARTIST OF YOUR OWN . PAINT IT. LIVE IT . LOVE IT.

THERE IS A CHOICE even when you believe there isn’t. Find it.

Bitter-sweet moments.

  It’s only when you start working you realise how cruel the world can be!

“Do I have it in me to make it my own?”

Change What you can, move past what you can’t.

Simple rule.

ADAPT and get yourself tuned to the music of reality.

Had started this journey  with a goal in mind
Met people  so cruel, so unkind!
….not all was good, not all was bad….
Have so much to worry, so much to be sad..
I’d often  question,” where  did it all go?”
The fun, the frolic, those laughing rows.
It was all so merry, so peaceful ,  so light.
To have friends around you day and night.

Walking this alien road,
I see so much has changed.
Lines have grown  on my forehead. Oh what strains!
How much I wish  I could  go back in time,  and live some  more.
But this is reality.  No wonder  life’s  painfully  slow.

Why do I feel it a burden?
Can’t I make it a jolly ride?
If I have it in me! Time  will decide.

Alas! Too long have I forgotten  the goal I so wanted.
It’s time I get over these annoying  tangles, and see that my focus  doesn’t get tainted.

It’s still a journey. One I ought to live.
Let me learn to love it.
Let me be at ease.
I can. Can’t  I?
If I want to, won’t  I?
I will, will I not?

Move on,  past the things making me hold on to grudges.
I will atune myself  to the new music  of my reality.

Days tumble into night, and I wonder when will I get that break?

Always trying to make me feel lighter, no matter how much I get bit by snakes.

It’s not crude. It’s just the bitter side.

Sometimes life’s just a beautiful messy ride.

What happened???

From a baby nestled in her mother’s arms
To a toddler crawling on the floor…
A toothy grin… or a wail so loud..
Thundering the neighbors’ doors.
What happened?

Like a child running all around..
Yelping, screaming or pouting …
Laughing, giggling or dancing..
Singing, dreaming and grinning..
What happened?

Crushing secretly.. sighing..
Admiring the temptations..
Tasting the fatal “Don’ts”
Oh the Teenage dramatic moans!
What happened?

Basking in the sun of youthfulness..
Growing over and above ..
Learning , changing, accepting..
Hurting, smiling, Still sailing..
What happened?

Aging in time… growing by mind..
Older we be… solving the mysteries..
Crying, grumbling, loosing faith..
Or rather- rising, smiling with courage!
What happened?

Memories rush.. everything’s hushed..
Echoing deep.. something leaps..
Agonizing puzzles.. silent storms..
Victorious glory.. happy songs..
What happened?

Don’t we all come across such moments… when we wonder:
“What the hell happened?”     “How did I reach this far?”                    “How did I change?”    “How did life change?”
Life is a nasty road… You gotta go up… sometimes even fall down..Rise again, crumble again. Smile or cry or wail or say “WHY?”
All good things , do come to an end. Not always there’s a happy ending. Silent storms help you become stronger.

Whatever happens/happened, whether you like/liked it or not – doesn’t matter, it has/had to happen, not only because it is/was meant to be but also because you are/were meant to grow over your weaknesses, find your courage, learn to rebel and learn to appreciate not just life but yourself.

Trace your life backward and you’ll see the way everything has changed.

Take time to ponder on “What all happened?”
Its nice to read your own life; smile over the times you acted stupid , impulsive, foolish or stubborn; be proud over the decisions you took, the resolutions you stood by, the many wishes you made, the dreams  that you made sure become your reality; the times you let your wounds heal; the times you learnt a lesson -maybe a hardway; the times you realised what made you special; the times you felt ten times your age; the times you smiled even when you crumbled within; the times you were simply happy…..
In all the agonising moments, we fail to remember the many many happy moments we had. Count such moments. Count the number of times you smile a day. Count the many blessings you have. Count the many breaths you have taken so far and well, aren’t you still breathing? Count the many times you were saved from looming storms. Count the many times you almost gave up, but something/ someone didn’t let you give in. COUNT.
Once you count. You’ll know what happened!

Be happy. Its life. You get what you deserve. Nothing more. Nothing Less. Even if its a frightening storm, know it will pass, know you can handle it. Enjoy every phase of life. These are the seasons that once slipped never come back. And once lived are enough. The little you have is much more than many can have.

Small moments you live make life easier, cause big moments are a rare catch. Everyone plays this game called life, all get fair chances, fair lifelines, fair choices and fair breaks.

Play it well…. whilst you always remember to enjoy.

LESSON 1- Lets get a few things on track……

I break and then hustle…

I fall and again stumble…

hmmmmphh …..I wonder “WHY??? why only me?” ..

then I hear them say “You oughta learn to say ‘Life try me'”

  Watch a toddler learning to stand. He falls and falls , cries and screams, and sometimes also laughs from within—-

Does he give up?  NO

Should you? must you? How many times have you fallen? Did you keep a count? Is it hard to remember? Are you still stuck at that spot where once you fell? have you counted the miles since you moved on? 

YOU ARE NEVER STUCK IN LIFE. TIME AND LIFE KEEP MOVING ON. WHAT PERHAPS IS STUCK- IS YOUR MINDSET. DON’T BE A PRISONER TO THE PAST OR TO THE MANY FALLS YOU HAD/ HAVE / WILL FACE. SET YOUR MIND FREE.

RESOLVE AND KNOW THAT NO MATTER HOW MANY FALLS, YOU STILL NEED TO RISE, SOMETIMES THERE WON’T BE ANYONE TO HELP. YOU CAN’T KEEP CRYING ABOUT IT. SO KINDLY DO THE HONOURS TO RISE and DUST OFF THE REMINDERS OF YOUR FALL. MOVE ON.

If you’re wounded- Remember WOUNDS DO HEAL. If you say- sometimes scars remain.. then “Come on TOUGHY, treasure it like an achievement. Wear it off. Flaunt it. Fall in love with it.It is the tattoo of your strength.

Whether visible to human eye 

or not.”

CHANGE  YOUR  ATTITUDE  TOWARDS  EVERYTHING THAT DEGRADES  YOUR  SPIRIT.

You cannot escape the falls you’ll face in life. Each time you fall try to change your  vision to see only the good in it. If you still can’t. Laugh at it. But stop grieving, STOP LETTING IT BOTHER YOU, stop   cursing, STOP SELF PITY.

EVERYTHING IS A CHOICE.

You want to be happy?  CHOOSE happiness.

You want to stop Self Pity? CHOOSE to give yourself some RESPECT.

CHOOSE to treat yourself BETTER than any other.

CHOOSE to Rise when you Fall.

CHOOSE to Smile amidst all agony.

CHOOSE TO SOAR YOUR SPIRIT- TO LIGHTEN YOURSELF.

CHOOSE to be the self you can LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY.

So let’s get something RIGHT!!

YOU  AND  YOU  ALONE  HOLD  THE  KEY  TO  YOUR HAPPINESS.

Do not give it away and then regret.