You don’t have to befriend every human in existence.
If you don’t vibe, YOU DONT VIBE.
DON’T FORCE YOURSELF.
Sometimes being strangers or mere acquaintances is good for the both of you. This way life is more civil, less toxic, more of blessings, less of hate, negligible drama.
It is only when you feel forced to vibe with people who too feel the same, you’ll know there is this strange barrier in your head of non acceptance, somehow your brain will try looking for flaws & specks in the other to strengthen the thought of hate or dislike into something more dangerous.
Stop. You are trespassing the negative territory. Parents should understand this, when a child is uncomfortable with your friends kids , do not force them to befriend each other, they will grow up having this animosity inside them , learning the art of pretence for your sake.
Sometime back, no matter how good friends we are now, I faced a confession, that stuck in my mind. She said she hated me back then as I was the unwanted intruder. I got the vibes back then but what I didn’t know it was that she actually felt the whole why are you forcing to befriend her thing until now. I understand how your brain is made to adapt and adjust and how the negativity simply becomes an acceptable habbit of indifference. Now, we are simply acquaintances. And I like that. There’s nothing toxic. We respect each other, we talk and smile without a trace of ‘we haven’t spoken in ages’, it’s normal & good.
When things can be so normal, why pretend to feel indifferent when you actually force yourself to accept & gel along.
The problem with me is, I’m at this phase where I’m so calm, collected and thinking all those childhood stages, phases and understanding what was right, and what was wrong & why it was wrong.
So when time comes for me to mother my kittens, I know not to bound them to unhealthy norms of a perfectly acceptable lifestyle.