I envy my best friend ( in a good way) for her practical approach to life.
I can’t be practical , no matter how much I try.
And now I know why.
I’ve always battled with this, now I feel at home.
I am an artist, a creative soul.
I think deep, I imagine wild , I feel every emotion right from the very core of my soul.
Every thing I love to do, for me is to work with my all, passionately , deeply & intoxicatingly being aware I’m drowning into it in the moment.
When I’m writing, I’m lost. When I’m painting, I’m lost, in this place that’s mesmerizing, there’s just me, and calm and peace, serenity, compassion.
I’m sensitive to the heart, I’m impulsive.
I get bored easily , so I’m fidgity, my mind boggles almost everything around, observing, wondering, wandering, seeing shapes in the clouds or art in rustic walls, words in the gushing waters.
I can sit with you, and talk not one word, if I’m comfortable around you. And that silence I can enjoy. I don’t talk much when I’m thinking or putting a masterpiece together in my mind.
I had been a people’s pleasing person all my life , because I couldn’t say “no”. Now, I can. I am a people inspiring person now. I love making one person smile everyday, may it be my words, may it be my prayers, may it be my very impulsive crazy madness.
I’m bubbly & cheerful & childlike when I’m in a good mood, but when I’m not, I’m quiet & spaced out. Yes, I over think, a day dreamer, a night thinker, sometimes I plan, sometimes I go with my gut. And my instincts are always always always damn fckng right.
Being practical is going with that smart way of doing things in life, it involves lesser risk. But me? I love risks , I get drawn to complicated hazards for no reason. I take paths I choose, not practical, not always smart, but somehow soulful..
. – Leandra. .
(I wrote this to remind me on the days I wish I be more practical, why I can’t be what I’m not and why I should be happy for what I am. Creative souls are never practical, they are messy & crazy & feel everything in it’s greatest details. )